Remember those times when you feel like you are living life out of a book.
And times when you are living life in a blur.
That's what happening to my life. I don't even know if i am living it or it is living by itself.
You love to write (You means me here), everything you come across you promise yourself that you will write about it, and then it just blurs out.
So much happened in the time that lapsed.
Lil Bun turned one end of the May. Past months he faced ear infections (twice) and had a sick period but look at him now is no more a baby, almost walking. Almost because that is as long as he doesn't know he is, as soon as he realizes he is walking on his own he comes and holds your hand. So now i am finding tricks to make him more absent minded so that he doesn't realise he is walking. Does it make sense to you? You believe and try to picture everything i say, don't you? I know. hehe
Also I am back to love cooking, (and take pictures of it like some food maniac so that can blog about it, and then keep prostrating ! Sigh). Have so much lined up, i will get back to it. I promise. Meanwhile seriously want to get my blogs new look and feel, but i do not know how and love of my life is too busy now a days to help me out. So basically i am just waiting for some miracle to happen.
Have been feeling good to fit in old cloths ( not "old" old, but those from pre-pregnancy) but at the same time very well aware that still not back at what i used to be. But what does it matter as long as you feel comfortable under your skin. And let's face it i am not the same anymore inside out. I am a mom of a little miracle of our lives that indeed changed us and our lives inside out.
If you don't feel good in a dress, don't buy it. If that dress is too tight for you, just notch up a number and go for another dress, as long as you feel good and you are comfortable.
Life is too short to be worried, to take stress and to worry about what other people think about you or they like you or not.
Now that we are catching up on time lapsed inbetween, let me admit.... ahem, I also got a year older (and wiser, hopefully) this April. It must be wiser to overcome obsession of FaceBook for say. But i am still there to keep a check on you that you don't do anything ridiculously naughty. Ohh did i just say that? What i really wanted to say is don't care for people thinking it is because of side-effect of having a baby which makes you to have not enough time. It might be true at times, but it will never be true to the core for always. Having him in our lives just taught us that there are more important things in life than living a virtual life, picturing a perfect life and eyeing other picture-perfect lives.
I don't think being fake, jealous, judgmental or to be around such negative auroras was going to do any good to me. Instead of pretending why can't i just be what i feel like, why can't i just say what i think about. And who cares seriously, well i know we all do care at one point or other but i mean isn't it good that you get to miss me and long to see me, just so that you can go being your bitchy/ judging self? haha But i like the part that you long to see me, i will ignore the rest ! I am in a good mood you see?
Just my 2 cent of advise, having an awesome life in real is more important than having an awesome virtual life. Virtual life can wait, real life won't.
See i told you, i am getting wiser with age. Now don't roll those eyes, okay?
See i told you, i am getting wiser with age. Now don't roll those eyes, okay?
So back to so much happened...
I am really happy as after about one year i managed to be back at reading. Reading is something i always loved since i was a kid. Haven't be reading any intellectual stuff really if you ask me. Just some chic lits from Jill Mansell, just because i liked one of hers and ended up ordering so many from her. Light, and very chic. And with characters you can relate and can take you back to those bright dreamy days of hopeless romance your eyes sparkled with, once upon a time. I feel happy. All books end happy. Perfect. I love happy endings. Eventhough it doesn't make any sense in the real world still i do, I am a girl you see.
We managed to take some vacations. I don't remember if i mentioned before but i had such high hopes from Easter holidays. But i ended up cancelling and re-scheduling bookings to May because of weather (too much rain, too cold, snow in spring, seriously?) and health of my lil Bun.
But the weather started getting better, and so did everything around us. We made a trial trip to small beautiful town of Belgium "Kortrijk" and a beautiful city from France "Lille" and of april. It was great, eventhough i was sick at the time, i felt great. We were out, breathing fresh air, bathing in sun, eating good food. Happy. Good.
And we made my re-scheduled trip from march in May. We been to Malta. Honestly it was nothing compared to what i had expected out of it.
All I thought about was beaches, sun and warmth. And not to forget convenience of speaking english. But it ended up surprising me with much more than that it has to offer. Whether it was having a stroll in it's capital Valletta, or getting lost in time capsule in old city Mdina, or just simply standing there overlooking the Bastions ! It was perfect.
All I thought about was beaches, sun and warmth. And not to forget convenience of speaking english. But it ended up surprising me with much more than that it has to offer. Whether it was having a stroll in it's capital Valletta, or getting lost in time capsule in old city Mdina, or just simply standing there overlooking the Bastions ! It was perfect.
We explored almost whole island and our lil Bun behaved himself like a pro-traveller. So proud of him. And so happy that he inherited liking for travelling from his parents. He was so happy to be out, to enjoy the freedom of playing in open air, to stand at the balcony and gaze at sea while the breeze plays with his face. He smiled, he laughed and we all felt utterly happy.
So what else can i say, just that Life is good. Thanks for everything that i am. And thanks for accepting me as i am. You didn't mean to me this much without a reason. Yes i mean you, you !
6 comments:
It's been such a long time since your last post but after reading this, I think you've made up for the lost time! Really such soothing words. Reading this post was like watching slow motion movie, savouring every bit of it. That virtual life can wait but real one can't was the highlight of the post for me!
Au revoir! :)
Lovely words Lops.... but i am not able to understand, what you are trying to say... Are you happy or sad? You dont know, you are living life or it's just passing. Before marriage, we are living life for us. But after marriage and having kid, we are living for them. So we feel it is just passing as we will not be able to focus on our goals or hobbies. Always its good to be busy. I agree that most ppl living virtual life.... ppl try to find enjoyment outside, but actual enjoyment is within ourselves. Isn't it? You are saying, i am least bother about other thinks... But actually you are bothered otherwise, you will not mentioned so much about them here. You are a wonderful person and be as you are... God bless you, Ashu and Lil Bun....
@I HEARD YOU
Hey there, thanks for not forgetting me all this lapsed time and for dropping by with your good uplifting words :-)
On the second thought over what i wrote i realized, even this blogging word is a virtual life, isn't it? damn it. No wonder i haven't been blogging as much as i used to be...hehe :-P
@Anonymous
Haha, lovely words which doesn't make any sense, huh? ;)
I will not say happy or sad, "sad" is not a right word... i will put it as overwhelming. Specially with a fist kid, there is so much things happening and everything is new, exciting, frighting all at the same time. So time just flies, you learn a lot and live a lot and still when you look back it feels like just a blur. That is what i meant, it is like just yesterday i was pregnant and today my lil Bun is already one !
I am happy that i am back to managing my life and hobbies, makes me feel good.
About what other thinks, i do agree with you. It does bother me at times, or may be at lots at times. But that is what i am trying to do, putting it out so it gets out of my system. What i meant was why should it bother us and what's there to be bothered when we all know life is too short to live at the fullest in its finest forms. And to be true there are lots of things which doesn't matter to me anymore which used to at one time, so who cares...you never know what's coming next ;)
P.S. Sorry, i had to edit last line of your comment. If you read it now you will understand why.
Still I will say Lovely words.... I appriciate your spirit that you didn't took my comments other way.... This is a quality of good human being...
Com'on, what was there to take other way around? You meant good, didn't you?
And moreover I shouldn't be writing here, if i were to take offence from people who care enough to read, express and share their thoughts. :-)
Thank you my anonymous friend. :-D
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