Sunday, June 20, 2010

Happy Father's Day !

As they say, there comes pros and cons with everything in life and so does with this life as an expat, living away from homeland. With so many good things, one which tops as a down sides is missing family back home, missing parents!

It is but obvious why suddenly this is on my mind, Yes 20th June - Father's Day !

Well , back in India this occasion didn't mean much, not because it is not celebrated or no one knows about it, ( in fact in recent time if i say there is hardly any day or festival not celebrated in India it will not be an exaggeration. Indians love to celebrate and they need a hint of a reason), but more because of a culture where parents and children relationship is a bit different and even staying together with parents for whole life is also considered a way of life. Then your everyday is a mother's day or a father's day.

Today morning i messaged papa wishing him Father's day and reply came...
" Thank you, but i believe these formalities are not necessary,fir bhee new society rules it's ok. we will also follow the social norms. we miss u."

And i couldn't but smile !

There is no way any of us can thank our parents for all what they have done for us with a single word of "Thank you ". But isn't it still better to express your feelings on a name of one day than to think one day is not enough and then never express how we feel !
So think there comes importance of such days, they give us a reason atleast to express our gratitude or just to acknowledge the fact we know and we will be always grateful for all the love. Wish we can be as you are.

When compared mom and dad, Mom's love always remains more expressive, but still it is dad's is never the less.

I know days when papa would be late from hospital due to some emergency and i will fall asleep before he is home. When back, he will just sit beside me with his hands in my hair eventhough i wouldn't know !

I remember days i used to think that if i am sick and papa will just touch my forehead and i will be alright as he has special power and somehow growing up from a kid hasn't help much with that belief. For most of us as a kid, dad is always a super hero who fixes all our problems in a blink of an eye time.

I remember when i would be angry and sleep crying, he will come to my bed at the midnight as he wouldn't fall asleep. He will sit there beside a sleeping kid promising to make it ok whatever made me cry or angry.

I always knew when you didn't tell me something or gave an opinion about something you didn't like or didn't approve, just because you knew we will never disobey your words and you wanted us to be ourselves, taking our decisions ourselves. Thanks for that wisdom and freedom Papa.

As a part of growing up, understanding/maturity came ( or atleast we thought so ) - me, my sister and brother, we decided that we should be sorting out our silly problems ourselves than any tensions or troubles to parents. Being the eldest I also ordered them to come to me if that need arise than troubling parents with our silly problems. And we all agreed thinking we are mature now.
But alaaas... what were we thinking? Is it ever possible?

From tone of our voice they know what's in our mind. With a glance of our face, our smile will make them know. They have known us longest and there is no one who can know us more !

One of those time while i was staying in a different city for my masters studies and was trying to prove myself more responsible and grown up, not speaking much when in fact i needed them most, i received a call from dad, asking how was i doing and as i replied my usual all well, he told me something which i will never forget ...
Dear, we know you are mature, and we believe in you and all the decisions you take. We know you can take care of yourself and you are strong enough to manage everything but all we want is to be there for you. Let us to be there, let us be the part of your life - of what you are going through. We don't want anything but to support, can you please let us just support?

And there i was, speechless with tears in my eyes! Guess we are never grown up enough when it's our parents.
That taught me - no problem is that big to discuss with parents. May be one day whole world will turn face against me but still i will have them.

Thank you for everything Mom & Dad, thank you for what you are.
I know wherever we are, you are always there as a strongest support / pillar of our lives and values we hold in life today.

Happy Father's Day Papa, I know you will be always there and I promise i will be always there.

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Lizzy said...

Aww Lopa this is the sweetest and most thoughtful post ever! I love it and it brought tears to my eyes!

Invader_Stu said...

that was a lovely post

Anita said...

You are very responsible - maybe because you are the eldest of three siblings ? Well, I am the eldest of three as well but I was never a charismatic leader of the other two ! You have a lot of emotional intelligence.
And no, I didn't call my father on the 20th of June. In Brazil it is celebrated on another date. But then there's web cam - he is more interested in his grandchildren than me, hehehe!

sagarika said...

Lovely post lopa, It brought tears in my eyes...You are right no matter how independent we tried to be we r still kids to our parents...Your parents are lucky to have a responsible daughter like u ...:)

~ Lopa said...

@ Lizzy 
Thank you Lizzy. When i was writing this post at night, it brought tears to my eyes and i couldn't write anymore. Even the spell-check run i did in the morning !
This is something so close to my heart. Thanks for your nice words.

~ Lopa said...

@ Invader_Stu 
Thank you Stuart, happy you felt so :)

~ Lopa said...

@ Anita

Yes Anita, I am the eldest of three. Well since i was a kid people used to tell me i am mature and practical which felt proud at sometimes and hated at times...hehe

Even i didn't call my dad that day, as we talked on Saturday and there was nothing much new here, but i text him on FB....hehehe. Trying to make them internet savvy like we are :P

I think all grand-parents are the same. I bet once we have kids, that's what going to happen with us as well....something's ok if you are busy, carry on, just let us see our grand-kid ;) hehe

~ Lopa said...

@ sagarika are here, busy girl.
But i understand your exam pressure, i hope it went good.
I think for all parents ( well atleast most of), they feel their kids best and lucky to have them. And same with us, our parents are the best and we are lucky to have them ! :o)

dipali said...

very thoughtful......nearly brought tears in my eyes......very true parents are with us every time and part of our life standing beside us as our spine.we are blessed to have sucha a wonderful parents...hopfully we can be gud parents to our kids.

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

I Have also post a long reply on google account pl. try to find out. papa

Hetal said...

Lovely and touchy post lops... truly said whatever happen parents can never turn their face against us...

AmitL said...

Lopa,this was really touching...brought back so many memories for me,and, the times spent in our ancestral home with Dad and the rest of the family..cherished moments,indeed.

Haddock said...

Yes living away from our parents make us realise their true value.

Witty Jester said...

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Witty Jester said...

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Unknown said...

Dear Lopa, I finished your post with tears in my eyes. I understand you sooooo much!
But in my case I can not call my dad anymore, I can not sms him, nor see him on skype nor visit him. My dad has passed away in 2005 but his words and his wisdom are always in my heart, he protects me from wherever he is, and -just like your dad- he always supported me.
I loved this post. Thank you for sharing it!

~ Lopa said...

@ dipali 

See this is what staying away from home does to us... reading about parents makes us miss them so badly that it brings tears ! :o)
Yes, we are lucky and we wish someone feels same way for us :o)

~ Lopa said...

@ Anonymous

Thank you papa :o)
Yes days flies ! Hope to see you soon.

~ Lopa said...

@ Hetal 

Thanks Hetu, when it is something close to our heart, whatever we try to keep it short, it doesn't go without playing with strings of our heart !

Yes, i truly believe there, if you hurt someone else they might leave you, but however hurt parents will be, still they will always stand beside you !

~ Lopa said...

@ AmitL 

Those memories are indeed precious, something to cherish whole life.

Also i have noticed with my friends saying, when they have kids, they value their parents even more.... hehe May be because then it is more clear what their parents went through with them and how nicely they managed !

~ Lopa said...

@ Haddock 

Very truly said.
Welcome to my blog !

~ Lopa said...

@ Witty Jester 

Thank you.
That is so nice of you with all those encouraging words !

~ Lopa said...

@ Leti 

Ohh i am so sorry to hear about your dad, Leti.
Wherever our parents are, their memories always remains fresh in our heart to cherish forever !

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